Great Scott!

Wow, where was I when all this went down? I think I saw a flash of it on the news, but didn't really read about it until today.

This is so fucked up on so many levels, but not really surprising. We had some middle school girls get in a fight and put it on YouTube, so if it happened here, it probably happens all over. The fact that these girls' parents were making excuses for their behavior just makes me want to vomit. If there's one group of assholes I hate more than any other, it's entitled kids and their trifling-ass parents who raise them that way. See: parent nonsense, bubble-pizza bitch. Damn, people. You are not doing your kid any favors by fighting every battle for them that they come across, particularly if their kid is in the wrong. The foolish idea that children and teens don't make mistakes, let alone need to learn from their mistakes, is ridiculous. That's what growing up is: learning from the mistakes you will inevitably make. If there are no consequences to your actions, all you are learning is that your mom and dad will bail you out (figuratively and literally) any time you make a poor decision.

I see this all the time with my kids. Don't get me wrong, I don't believe that the majority of my kids would pull some cheerleading beat down. I believe they know better than that. But a whole lot of my kids lie, cheat, and manipulate on a daily basis, with little care for any potential consequences. A huge percentage of my kids actually work harder to manipulate their way out of a given situation, whether it be homework or something else, than it would take to actually do what is required. They do not fear consequences, because either they will not have any consequences, or, if there are consequences, they either will disregard them or they're minimal. The threat of in or out-of-school suspension is laughable. Don't even think about detention--they won't go. But their problem-solving skills only extend to getting out of things. They can't use problem-solving skills to actually do anything of value.

Is this new? Or was I so busy actually do shit in high school that I didn't realize that everyone else was clowning? I mean, I told some lies in my day, but I have kids who lie ALL THE TIME. About stuff that doesn't even matter. I hear bullshit excuses every damn day. Just tell me the truth. Life happens. I am a master procrastinator/ball-dropper. But take some responsibility for your lack of completion.

Chris and I were talking about this idea the other day: nothing is really special any more. There's no such thing as a real "treat". When not owning an iPod is the norm, not the rule, you know times have changed. I think back to ten years ago. No one even had cell phones, let alone $250 gadgets. Granted, those $250 gadgets did not exist, but was there something similar? When I was 14, the coolest thing a kid could own would be a moped or roller blades, preferably both with a tow rope, and you know only one or two kids you knew had a moped. Almost all of my kids have iPods and cell phones. Seriously, it is an anomaly for a child to not have one or both. Had I asked my parents for something that cost $250, they would have laughed hysterically, then handed me the classifieds.

Jesus, now I just sound like my grandpa. But honestly, I just worry about the level of values kids have these days. I'm not talking about premarital sexin' or religion. I'm talking about honesty, hard work, compassion, kindness, and integrity. These days, it seems like everything is about material possessions, money, fame, and getting attention/seeking approval from potential love interests.

I feel as though American culture is perched precariously on the verge of either totally annihilation or enlightenment. Kind of like on Back to the Future 2, when Marty goes to the future and Biff owns everything, and everything is porn-organized-crime-vice related because Biff gets the sports trivia book and makes a fortune. So Marty has to make it so that his kids aren't complete fuck-ups in the future. Is there a pivotal event that we could go back and change to fix this situation? Is this really an issue, or did I make it up in my mind, or is it just the same tired "kids-these-days" crap old people have based their bitching on for generations? Have I asked enough Carrie-Bradshaw-esque rhetorical questions for one day?

Thoughts for a Friday

Sorry I've been absent this week. I was busy with soccer games and furiously trying to finish homework. I'm about to peace up to Kirksville for our annual soccer alumni weekend. It is official that I will be one of the three oldest ladies there, which means I don't have to play a minute of the game if I so desire. Sidenote: the Holiday Inn in Kirksville has some nerve to try to charge $100/night for a room. For that price, there better be an open bar in my room, a bidet in the bathroom, and free limo rides to the Dukum Inn. I will take my $47 room at the Super 8, remove the comforter from the bed, spray some Method Cinnamon air freshener to cover up the smell of smoke, and be on my way for cocktails, thank you very much.

Because of my impending departure and the fact that I probably should do some real work even though I have 27 days left up in this bitch, at most, I am just going to holla some quick thoughts at you. BTW, if anyone wants to pay me a lot to do very little, I'm totally available. I'm thinking about starting a business where people pay me to deal with awkward situations that need to be dealt with. Some lady microwaving stank fish every day in the office, but nobody wants to say anything to her? Don't use a passive-aggressive note. I'll say it to her face for you for a nominal fee. Dislike your best friend's new baby daddy? I'll tell him he needs to stop wearing socks with sandals and talking like Borat all the time. Won't faze me. Think about it. It's like a courier service, but I deliver the truth.

* Can we talk about the much-anticipated return of The Office? It was like every awkward dinner party you've ever been to morphed into Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf and then slapped the dinner party scene from Go in the face. Chris's observation pretty much summed everything up as the episode wound down: "It's so funny, I never want it to end, except it's so awkward, it feels right that it does." True.

* A kid in my room right now has his own picture on his shirt. Him playing basketball with a biblical quote underneath it. Granted, he is a phenomenal athlete, but who does this? Really?

* The new Raconteurs is freaking unbelievable. I would highly recommend that you get it. In other music news, one short week after we got our tickets for Wakarusa, Ben Folds and Built to Spill were added to the lineup. I saw Ben Folds in 2004 with Guster and Rufus Wainwright, and hearing him and Rufus duet Careless Whisper by Wham! changed my life. In addition, I would also recommend Wakarusa if you want to go to a festival but don't want to be completely and totally overwhelmed by the crowds of insane people. Waka is fairly small, the lineups are sweet, and camping chill. I could never do Bonnaroo because I could never deal with that many assholes in one place. This is something I realized while waiting in line to go up in the Space Needle: I can't deal with large groups of assholes, which is why I should stop working at a high school. Plus, Wakarusa is only four hours away in Lawrence, KS, a lovely college town.

RickRoll'd!

Take that, hate mongering assholes!

Support Tower Grove Farmers' Market

I've mentioned before how much I love the Tower Grove Farmers' Market. It's a true grassroots market that I've watched grow over the past two seasons thanks to the efforts of Patrick Horine and Jenny Ryan (the duo also responsible for Local Harvest Grocery). Everything there is locally grown, several of the vendors are certified organic, and those that aren't still use more sustainable methods than industrial agriculture. The market is always bustling with something new, be it yoga, speakers, or a fresh crepe stand.

They run almost entirely on donations and volunteer hours, and they're in need of some funds to keep things going and growing. This year, they've added a series of political speakers, a farm to table program for schools, a kitchen incubator project, and now accept food stamps. They're really doing things right over there and I'd hate to see it falter due to a relatively small amount of money. Keep this great community event going by becoming a friend of the market and donating. You're getting $600 soon, anyway.

Weekend Update, if you care...

After next weekend's trip to Kirksville, I'm straight detoxing, because my body, particularly my vital organs, cannot take much more of this weekend bingeing.

Friday was pretty low key. I had drinks with friends at a local happy hour, then watched the six-car MRH state basketball championship parade from said happy hour. Chris and I hit up Pi, the new pizza joint on Delmar across from the Pageant. They've got a sustainable bent (the servers all had shirts that said "Green Is The New Black"), a good beer list, and incredible pizza (down with Provel!). Seriously, really, really good.

Saturday, Chris's mom called and said she had Birds tickets, so we hopped on the Metrolink and went down to Busch. It was a beautiful day for a game, although we were under the overhang in left field, which was about ten degrees cooler than in the sun. The Birds won, hooray. Being a non-native St Louisan, it's not totally in my blood to jones for baseball to start, but being at Busch really made me feel like it was spring. I love how vibrant the colors are at the stadium, I love the smell of the food, I like the sounds and the rituals and the people watching.

Chris and I went to Euclid Records, where I picked up the new Raconteurs, the rerelease of Whiskeytown's Strangers Almanac, and a Felice Brothers' disc. Score. Then my friend Emily came into town and all hell broke loose. Long story short, there was more karaoke at Harry's (where I realized I've been denying the world an opportunity to hear me sing "Stay" by Lisa Loeb for too, too long), and the night ended up in my friend's Pee-Wee's playhouse-like house watching him and Chris roller skate (as in black quads with neon green wheels) around to 80s sitcom theme songs until 4AM. It was Roll Bounce up that bitch. My abs still hurt from laughing. Good times.

Had MoKaBe's delicious, delicious brunch with Emily, which unfortunately, did not cure my wicked hangover, and then walked over to kickball. It was such a beautiful day. Too bad our whole team had been out until the wee hours and we played like poop. Luckily, the teams we played generally play like poop on a good day, so we pulled out the win, and I actually got some color on my face so I no longer look like Tilda Swinton in The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe.

All in all, it was a really, really fun weekend, one that my liver will hate me for for a while.

This week I'm cracking the books as I've got a presentation via video due Wednesday, a paper to finish and Heart of Darkness to reread. Good thing I'm taking 2 1/2 days off. Thanks, MAP test!

Friday Funtime From the Archives

My colleague just reminded me of a crazy student we used to have who once sent him a paper via e-mail. From his e-mail address: bigassdick@yahoo.com


I swear this is true.

Awesome Student Quote

From a student letter to Russ Carnahan for Government class about gas prices:

"I thought we went to war the second time to fight so the gas prices could decrease. Why are they increasing? This is what I think: if we stop the war, gas could decrease. Bringing the troops home will hopefully bring gas prices down. Isn't that what supports the war? Gas prices?"

This is why I am glad to go.

I have to vent about a student.

I have a student who is ridiculous. Really, truly, ridiculous. Condescending, patronizing, annoying, and refuses to do any type of work whatsoever because he thinks he's above it (even though, trust me, he is not). You may have heard of him here or here.

Today, in Creative Writing, I told his friend in our class that I heard from his English 10 teacher that his ghost chapter was really good (they had to write an additional chapter for the book Kindred by Octavia Butler, which is a totally awesome book if you have not read it). Annoying student, probably pissed that I didn't acknowledge his clearly Advanced chapter (which was unfinished AND written "from the perspective of blood"...I know, right?), says to the other student, "Isn't it annoying that we have to dumb down our writing for that assignment?"

Me, "What?"

Him, "Yeah, like, uh, because we had to write in the author's voice."

Me, "So you had to dumb down your writing to sound like Octavia Butler? You're saying you are a better writer than Octavia Butler? Seriously? You are so rude and condescending. Really. That's so rude. I'm really tired of you acting like you are so much better than every assignment you get, in this class and others. If everything is so easy for you, why don't you turn anything in? Ever?"

Him, "Uh."

Then, to prove my point exactly, I told the class they had to turn in their writer's notebook and an exit ticket on their research, which he tried to leave the room without doing. But I kept him until he turned stuff in. I guarantee when I open his writer's notebook file, he has less than half of the entries.

Yes, I know this kid has all kinds of issues, and I know that he really is smart (just not nearly as smart as he thinks he is), and I know it's all a show to mask his own insecurities. But it doesn't make it any less annoying, rude, or condescending to other individuals he encounters on the daily.

Did I tell you that he insisted on showing me a video of him playing guitar? Until I realized it was a System of a Down song and he was guitar-synching it to the actual track? Yeah, this is what I do.

Linky Links

I've got a post up on Sustainablog on ReadyMade magazine's new digital edition. I love magazines (ReadyMade is one of my faves) but they use up a lot of paper and clutter up my house. Go read both my post and the mag.

Trivia Night

Many people have asked if and when the third semiannual Backyard Trivia Night will take place. But of course! Chris and I are waiting for Spring to get here for real to set a date, but likely early May. We've got some ideas cooked up to liven things up, but it will, as always, rock your face off. If you have any suggestions for categories, inter-round events, prizes, or keg types, please comment. Start thinking about your team name and brushing up on useless facts via the Random Article generator on Wikipedia.

On a related note, Dan Z, who you may know as one member of the original winners of Backyard Trivia Night, the Champagne of Trivia (with Picklehead and Crusher-Destroyer) or as a kick-ass artist, recently featured an homage to trivia in his weekly RFT comic Amazing Facts...and Beyond!, including a shout-out to Backyard Trivia via highlighting a question about the Golden Girls theme song, which came straight from my brain.

You Do Not Suck At All

I have cheated on my regular karaoke night.

I love karaoke. Love it. I'm not a particularly good singer in any way, shape, or form, but I convince myself of it in the shower, on long car rides, or by drinking. This started shortly after I moved to St Louis. I was slowly ingratiating myself into South City, and my friends took me to the River City Pub. River City is just a few blocks past the city limits on Gravois in Affton. It's a nondescript, no-frills type of place. With its neon beer signs, Big Buck Hunter game, cash-only bar, pool table, and the overwhelming beverage of choice Bud or Bud Light, it didn't even have a sign until last year.

My first visit, the one that hooked me, was honestly the event that sealed the deal that I was having way more fun in St Louis than I would have had staying in Des Moines living in my parents' basement. In order to understand the phenomenon that is River City karaoke, you must first understand its host, the infamous Ali Baba. Ali Baba is a middle-aged Pakistani with a heavy accent who in recent years has taken to wearing half-glasses. He likes to drink Hot Damn and has a shirt that is a map of Missouri. His life outside of River City was somewhat of an enigma, until Lazer saw him while visiting a company for her work and discovered that he is a book binder by day. He has several catchphrases he uses during karaoke, including "You do not suck at all," "We all go to (Johnny) Gitto's!" and "Is everybody having good time? Social!" He also sings. His signature song is "I Feel Good" in which he adds "Bitch" to the end of the line "..'cause I got you." He wants everyone to buy $2 shots of Hot Damn.

There are also several regulars at River City, the most famous of which (and most noteworthy) is Steve-O. Steve-O is approximately 56 but looks like he's about 75. Years of heavy drinking and smoking pot (which he does out back; this you can note as you go to the bathroom) make speculating as to whether or not Steve-O is, in fact, dead if he is NOT at the River City Pub (which, incidentally, he allegedly lives above) a regular occurrence. Steve-O is a legend because he sounds (on his better days) uncannily like John Fogarty, whom he will choose to emulate by singing CCR, but more likely you'll hear singing his signature number, "Gangster's Paradise" by Coolio. You have not lived until you hear an ate-up, aged hippie sing "Gangster's Paradise" with every fiber of his being. Along with Steve-O, there's also the Vietnam vet who sings "Chocolate Salty Balls" in an extremely loud monotone voice, never realizing that the novelty wore off long ago. There's also the chick who occasionally works at the bar, hugs me every time I see her as if we're old friends, and sings "Love Shack" with the Vietnam vet.

By the grace of God, my first visit was someone's bachelorette party. Not only did I hear the incendiary "Gangster's Paradise" performance, but saw what elevates Ali Baba from "funny guy with accent" to "totally audacious character who regularly exhibits borderline illegal behavior". In case you were wondering, Ali Baba has no problem with public displays of affection. With relative strangers. On this particularly cherry-poppin' visit, I witnessed Ali Baba effectively dry-hump the bride-to-be on the dance floor. I also, luckily, saw the bride's skirt hiked up around her waist and her lack of both underwear and public hair. To this day, I believe it was the closest I've ever been to another woman's vagina. I've also seen, on numerous special occasions (thankfully, not including my own bachelorette party, which did make a stop at RC) lucky ladies hoisted up by their asscheeks so Ali can put his face between their legs. I am not kidding. Trust me, that I have seen this on multiple occasions, nay, it has happened to multiple People I Actually Know, is not a fact that doesn't shock my sensibilities every time I visit.

For a while, we went to River City every Saturday night, but I realized it's a lot more fun if you space it out. So we go there every other month or so, get tanked, and try and see who can sing the most ironic song. I was doing Journey's "Open Arms" for a long time, because it seemed like a song the clientele would enjoy and I enjoy emulating Steve Perry. But I've switched it up to include "Brandy" by Looking Glass, "Purple Rain" by Prince, and duets with K.Vav such as "Picture" by Sheryl Crow and Kid Rock. Banter sings the theme song from Ghostbusters, which is really awesome. K-Vav sings "Careless Whisper" by Wham, also Awesome.

ANYWAY, although there is a group of hard-core River City fan among those whom with I socialize, there are a few (including my husband) who hate River City. Yeah, I know, like, what? It was for that reason that instead of going to River City on Friday night after a long night of drinking with the girls that we decided to head for Harry's on Southwest.

I've been to Harry's before. Some of Chris's friends hang out there regularly. But I've never been for karaoke. Although the crowd wasn't as great or large, there were several elements that have elevated it to equal status with River City. First of all, song selection. In my experience (and Randy Jackson's) song choice is everything. I personally like 80s pop. Ali's song list has remained relatively stagnant over the years. I've been dying to emulate Chrissie Hynde. So the fact that Harry's had "Brass In Pocket" (and at least eight other Pretenders songs) was selling point #1. #2: In the middle of karaoke, the host turned off the mike and turned on three rap videos and thus began a short-lived dance party, which I was just drunk enough to participate in. Because of my experience with contemporary high school dances in urban areas, I have some knowledge of how to dance to rap videos. I believe I can "walk it out" as well as any 27-year-old white woman from Iowa. #3: Bubble Machine. #4: More than two types of beer available. #5: New crowd of which to make fun. One dude sang Drowning Pool. Um, seriously? A methhead in a Blues sweatshirt sang Evanescence's "Bring Me To Life" with one of the waitresses. One guy, seriously, sang "We Are The Champions" by Queen (and then Shannon sang "Somebody to Love" and I raised my hands up to the heavens from which she came).

Although I had a blast, I am hesitant to return to Harry's, even if it means I get to sing "Back on the Chain Gang". I feel like I've been in this long-term karaoke relationship with River City, and I'm cheating on it with the new, exciting, lusty Harry's. I don't know if the host at Harry's will ever greet me with an inappropriately-long hug or bump my song to the top of the list when I walk in. I do know I can use a credit-card there (plus) but I can't see Steve-O (minus, particularly since who knows when he's going to retire from karaoke on account of having to get a trach ring). I can sing "Party All The Time" by Eddie Murphy, but can I see a girl cry while sitting on a stool singing "Foolish Games" by Jewel? Chris will actually go to Harry's to see my vocal stylings, as opposed to River City, which he is loathe to set foot in. On any given night, would I rather be surrounded by the Bayless High School class of 2001 or the DuBourg class of 1999? And, as far as I can tell, people tend to keep their clothes on at Harry's, which could be a pro or con, depending on the person.

I guess it will have to be a game-time decision, one based on a careful consideration of all the pros and cons, one made in conjunction with whomever I am drinking with. But if I do decide to start going to Harry's with increased frequency, abandoning my karaoke roots in Affton, don't think I'm an unfaithful, wanton woman. I need to expand my horizons.

Just don't tell Ali Baba.

Halp!

Hey friends with cooler blogs than I.

Not that I don't have anything else to do, but I'm trying to expand the readership of my blog through social networking and media. However, there's so much out there I don't even know where to begin. Thoughts/advice from the pros? I would be so grateful. Leave a comment or e-mail me at kbestoliver (at) yahoo (dot) com.

I thought about starting with BNN. They seem to generate a lot of traffic for sites.

I kid! I kid!

Awesome Student Quote

"[Student 1 who said he was highly intelligent], not everthing in the world is a conspiracy perpetrated by the Freemasons. Get over it, it's annoying."

said by Student 2 who is actually intelligent.

Awesome Husband Quote

"Colonel Adama is like Tony LaRussa. Stoic. Never showing emotion."

Chris, while watching Battlestar Galactica Season Three.

Happy Baby!

Big ups to my cousin-in-law/regular blog reader Jenny and her husband Marc. Jenny popped out shorty #2, Elijah Benjamin, yesterday morning in the ER. Kid was hesitant to come out and I guess just decided to speed up the process once he got the nerve. Elijah joins big brother Jack. Congrats, Jenny, Marc, and Jack!

Jenny--How long until drinks?

Also, R.I.P. my hard drive. My suspicions were correct: you are indeed dead. Farewell all those 0s and 1s I knew as documents.

Last Saturday

My Spring Break was too short. I realized how behind I was in my Policy Development class so if I wasn't cleaning, at soccer practice, or running errands, I've been working on that. Today's the last push--I've been watching Outfoxed, then I have a class to watch, then a crap ton more reading. Since we have practice at 8AM tomorrow (don't even ask) then Easter with Chris's family, I've got to get as much done today as I can. Which is, logically, why I'm blogging as I watch Outfoxed streaming online. No worries, I had a triple cappuccino, so yeah, I'm good.

Chris and the League of Dorks (TM Sports Gal) have their fake draft today for their fake baseball teams. You cannot believe the level of preparation Chris has put into today. He has a leather legal folder full of various highlighted and chicken-scratched lists and printouts that he shuffles about endlessly. He's done at least six fake fake drafts. Yes, he does fake practice drafts to get ready for the real fake draft. Each one takes at least an hour. For the last week, he's had the folder by our bedside. When he can't sleep (possibly due to anxiety about the fake draft) he reviews his fake "research" until he falls asleep. Today, we had to make a special trip to Walgreens so he could get new highlighters for the fake draft. A friend called today while we were on the way to the fake draft (I dropped him off, obviously vaginas aren't allowed into the Fake Draft Batcave) looking for these "lists" because he didn't have a printer. After Chris got off the phone with him, he said, "I can't let him look of my lists. Then he'll know my strategy." I dropped him off at 11:30. As of 6:20, the League of Dorks are still pouring over their fake draft magazines and fake research and making their fake picks for their fake teams. Actually, by now, they may be debating their new fake teams and thinking about possible fake trades. Who knows?

I was stupid enough to try to go to the mall. It was one of those days when you have to drive around to find any parking spot, let alone a close one. Too many people stress me out, for reals. I was looking for a dress for a wedding next weekend. Found something cute, cheap, and made of organic cotton at H&M, but I've got to dress it up for the wedding.

Oh, the best part of today was that my laptop died. Well, it won't go past a gray screen with an icon of a file with a queston mark. Mac.com says that is no good. Bye bye, hard drive. Didn't back up recently, either, so I could be totally screwed. Luckily, it's not my computer. Sorry, school tech department. Hope you can fix it.

Thanks, Stat Counter!

A perv in Switzerland found my blog by searching for "sweet asshole", leading him to this post. Gross. Where's Chris Hanson when you need him?

Weekend Update

Whew. It feels good to be on Spring Break, even though I am keeping very busy catching up on school, cleaning my stank-nasty house, and going to soccer practice. I was so stressed, depressed, and tired of the cheeldren that I thought I would burst before 3:15 on Thursday. We drove up to Des Moines on Thursday night and then drove the rest of the way to Minneapolis on Friday.

We were staying in downtown Minneapolis because my school is downtown. On Friday, we planned to check in early, watch the streaming episode of Lost we missed Thursday, then I had a meeting with a professor. We stepped into the lobby of the hotel only to be assaulted by the familiar squees, cell phone rings, and interrogative tone of hundreds of teenagers. It would be my luck that a statewide DECA conference was wrapping up that weekend. Son of a bitch. Teenagers everywhere. I almost had a panic attack while waiting in line to check in. Through clenched teeth, behind mirrored sunglasses, I politely inquired as to the nature of mass of tightly-bundled hormones. The saintly-patient woman behind the counter smiled reassuringly and said, "They're leaving tomorrow." They would, however, thwart my timetable for events. After watching Lost, I left our 18th-floor room to go to my meeting with the professor and made my way to the elevator. When one finally arrived, naturally packed with teens, every single floor button was pushed. I immediately stepped out and waited for another elevator. Again, every single floor button was lit up. These motherfuckers. This totally karma coming back to me from all those soccer tournaments where my friends and I disturbed shit in hotels. By the time I got to my meeting, I was frazzled, flustered, sweaty, and my nose started running uncontrollably, which is undesirable when meeting with a professor about a paper. The worst part was that I was sweating profusely, and I was wearing my cool new "Bitches Get Shit Done" t-shirt under a lightweight bamboo sweater. I desperately wanted to take the sweater off and air out the jacuzzi under my arms, but I didn't really know the professor that well and how he would respond to two expletives in one t-shirt. So, I literally sweat it out.

The same thing would happen the next day when, after sleeping in past class starting time due to the age-old predicament of setting one's alarm to PM instead of AM, I didn't even attempt the elevator when I saw, no joke, at least 25 kids and their luggage waiting for the elevator the next morning. I took 18 flights down at breakneck speed, only to come into class 30 minutes late, sweaty, hair a hot tranny mess. I spent a lot of the weekend flustered, but mad props to the downtown Hyatt in Minneapolis. They handled the teen drama, and the other guests who had to deal with said drama, with class and hospitality. I'd recommend it.

Class was good, though, and Chris and I really enjoyed the time together in the car and hotel room. I particularly enjoyed our trip to IKEA on the way home, where we procured, unexpectedly, quite reasonably-priced new dressers, essentially doubling my clothing storage space, which is much more awesome than I imagined. We totally moved around our bedroom, and it seems much bigger even though we have more furniture in the room. Sucked putting together twelve drawers on Sunday night, but the results have been great. I totally love IKEA, and, after putting together both dressers, I really believe the quality of their stuff has increased over the past few years.

Anyway, I'm spending this week catching up on my Policy class, which includes watching Outfoxxed, cleaning and making minor home improvements, and hopefully drinking some beers, although not before soccer practice. That would be irresponsible.

Question

What do y'all think of Obama's speech on race? Discuss.

Sadness

Sometimes I need to use this blog just to get some feelings out, and this is one of those times.

I'm leaving my job. I was considering leaving since last school year, but then my district eliminated my position due to budget cuts (expected) and did not offer me a position in my building, they offered me my old crappy job at the alternative school (unexpected) even though I should have been offered a job in my building with my kids (which does exist). Basically, they made me an offer I couldn't accept, and that made my decision for me. I was very sad and hurt because I know that the reasoning behind this was personal. I offended a higher up because I stood up for something I believed in, and that put me on the short list of people that rock the boat and therefore must be eliminated. I have no bad observations in my file and I've done a million things for the district. My resume speaks for itself. But I am expendable.

In reality, I'm very happy about leaving and I know I'll be happier when I'm gone. One, I'm disillusioned with teachers' roles in the education system as it exists, and I don't feel like I'm doing as much as I want to be doing in terms of really, truly making social change. Two, there are just things going on here that I can't support, namely the treatment of teachers. I'd rehash it, but I just analyzed it in my paper and it took 10 pages just for the economic and political sections and I'm frankly so sick of it that I won't even get into it. Long story short, it's a toxic place to be right now and I'm glad to be done with it.

But, there's rumblings around school about me leaving which lets me know it's time to tell my kids. That's the part that sucks. Because I teach a large group of kids who have been left or abandoned by multiple people in their lives. And it sucks that I am going to be another one of those people. It sucks that the girls whom I've coached for the last three years, the girls who turned our program from never having a .500 season in school history to going undefeated in conference last season, that I'm not going to be there for their senior season. I'm sad that they might think that I'm leaving them, because that's not it. For me and my own sanity, I've got to go.

And I'm sad because for most of my adult life, a large part of my identity is as a teacher. I've been entrenched in this community and the work I've done with these kids. To walk away from that, from the relationships I have built with my kids, and from that atmosphere, is difficult. I'm having a little crisis right now because I don't think I can go into the classroom. I always swore that if I found myself getting bitter, I'd get out of the classroom, and right now, I'm bitter and my heart isn't in it. I look at the amazing teachers that I work with, the most intelligent, skilled, deliberate educators I've ever met. Sometimes I meet teachers from other places and am pretty aghast that they're in a classroom, because they just seem like amateurs compared to our staff. I'll be sad that they're not my colleagues any more, and I'll be sad that I won't be a teacher.

Mmmmm Veruca.

I basically finished my paper, so that's cool. Told y'all I'd get it done. I've got an update on the Scared Straight! story after I talk to Chris about it. Things got interesting there, I'll tell you what. But save that for later.

My weekend was mostly spent writing aforementioned paper, reading stuff about policy, and catching up on watching my video classes. I did sneak a trip in to Left Bank Books, where I picked up this, this, this, and this. I actually wanted to get the latest issue of Believer, but alas, they did not have it, which was a disappointment.

I also got down to Veruca Bakeshop, which is down on Sidney Street right next to the fabulous Niche restaurant. Niche pastry chef Mathew Rice is baking up a storm down there with some right fine pastries. I met Mathew when I went in Saturday morning (he recognized my name from a local online food forum), and he's a very nice guy who happens to make mean treats along with a mean Tahitian vanilla latte. I think his cupcakes are better than the ones from those fancy-pants cupcake bakeries around town who have yet to impress me. I'm also a big fan of the lemon bars and the better-than-Hostess snack cakes. If you get a chance, head down there and check out his goods. I don't think you'll be disappointed.

Sunday Reminscing

I knew it would be like this. You knew it would be like this. Paper due tomorrow, yet here I am, just getting it popping at 1:19 PM, and we've got soccer practice at 3:00. Why oh why am I blogging? What can I say? I'm committed to you.

But no worries! I will prevail; make no mistake, I will prevail. I've already got lots of the background work done, which is why I'm taking a little blogging break. I'm just chilling over at this place, drinking some fair-trade coffee and taking a trip down memory lane by listening to The Lemonheads seminal album It's A Shame About Ray. I've been looking through a pile of old CDs as I rebuild my iPod library (again! but I got the new 80GB Classic and it has quickly become MY PRECIOUS) and started uploading stuff such as Evan Dando, Juliana Hatfield, and the other dudes in the band. (Interesting sidenote: a colleague is cousins-in-law with this dude, so I heard). This takes me back to my old Sassy-reading days . Sassy once had an article about how Evan Dando just went to prom with some fangirl back in the day. They had the formal photo of him in a tux and everything. That's beside the point. The carthartic wash of adolescence just poured over me as I listened to this disc. Remember that cover of "Mrs. Robinson"? Ain't shit compared to "Rockin' Stroll", "Bit Part In Your Life", and "Buddy". I feel like I should just pop this on a playlist with Toad the Wet Sprocket, Buffalo Tom, and Blind Melon, pretend I'm Angela Chase, and call it a day.

Well, I have to work. Interrupt me if you feel so inclined.

TGIF

I'm exhausted. The worst part of being tired, the kind of tired that you can't stop thinking about, is how your eyeballs feels. Sure, there's the bone-tired body-tired where your limbs just sigh when you finally lay down to rest, but I'm talking about the I-didn't-get-enough-sleep-and-it's-catching-up-to-me tired where your eyeballs get itchy and, well, tired. Is there a more desperate everyday-life situation than craving sleep and knowing full well there's no relief in sight.

AND it's Friday. As in, I have social life stuff to do because hi! a girl needs a beer now and again. After Chris and I chill together and go visit this place under the false pretense that I have time to read for fun, I'll be heading up to Lemmons for the Dudes Mag Ish 11 (aka Snake Eyes) release party. Basically, the Dudes on my kickball team make a magazine. $5 cover, Celebrity Autopsy, Hot Atomics, and Devlin's Kids (yes, some Dudes have a band called Devlin's Kids) will be rawking. You should come if you're into irony, zines, rawk, beer, shuffleboard, or shit-talking.

I will then be spending the weekend writing a paper and watching class videos that I'm behind on.

Oh, snap. One of our most ridonkulous students just said, in front of his teacher, that he was just going to make up his works cited page for his persuasive essay. Said teacher said, "Hello, I'm sitting right here."
Student replies, "Oh, I though Mr. (Student Teacher) was our teacher."
Teacher, "Yeah, but I'm still your real teacher. Obviously if you cheat, I am going to tell Mr. (Student Teacher)."
Student, "That's gay." Said it all serious, no hint of offense or knowledge of wrongdoing or deception.

We're straight doomed.

Big Ups To My Home State

Iowa ain't no backwater farm state..err, maybe it is, but we love the cheeldren.

New Blog

I've been writing for GreenOptions since its launch over a year ago, and it's grown by leaps and bounds. We just launched a new food-themed blog, EatDrinkBetter, focusing on sustainable foods. I posted on Rachael Ray today, if you're so inclined. Despite the fact that she annoys the crap out of me and you can't escape her (seen her mug in the cracker aisle? Too much), her message that anyone can cook real food is empowering. I'm not ashamed to admit that there are some downright tasty 30 Minute Meals.

Snow Day. Psych.

Really, truly, and honestly, my school district is the only district in the entire St Louis city/county area that is in school right now. Right now, as fat flakes of snow fall and cover everything in a beautiful blanket, our teachers are trying to figure out what to do today while other teachers (including Chris) are snug in their beds. I had a great new project to start on in Creative Writing--we're working on personal narratives and other types of creative non-fiction, and we're going to have our own StoryCorps, with the kids interviewing each other about a significant event in their lives and recording them into podcasts. However, only ten kids showed up today. I'm not about to start something new and then have to explain the whole thing all over again tomorrow. So we just had catch-up time today.

The kids in my first class were freaking out about having to be in school, particularly as the snow fell harder and harder. I tried to assure them that they were safe and we'd probably let out early, but they were convinced that it was about to go Donner Party up in this bitch. One girl actually said, "I dare someone to try and steal my kidney."

More later. Things are pretty low-key around here with only about 50% of kids in attendance and the rest getting out early because their parents are worried about them.

Awesome Student Quote

"Martin Luther King, Jr is a beast."--drama student in my friend KD's class.

Babies With Babies

Feministing posted an interesting story about a Colorado state rep made a comment in public about how teen moms are "sluts" and his subsequent visit to a high school for parenting teen women. The comments following the article are probably even more interesting. I really like how some assholes want to have abstinence-only education in schools so students don't learn about contraception, then, when teens get pregnant, they don't want them to have access to abortions, but when the teens who choose to raise their children want to have a public education and/or services so they can better themselves and provide for their children, they are dismissed as "freeloaders" or "slut" or "wastes of taxpayers money".

Where's the public derision for the male "sluts" who participating in making said babies? Oh, wait, there aren't terms specifically tied to male promiscuity. My bad.

People: if you want to break the cycle of poverty among people who have only known generational poverty all their lives, we've got to figure out a system that empowers young people to gain social capital to do so--not welfare, but programs that help them figure out how to better themselves. I would much rather my tax dollars go to programs that help teen parents than to fund this bullshit war. When will the need to act punitively towards those teens (TEENS, i.e. still lacking frontal lobe development)who made mistakes quit superceding the progress we could make by giving people who have never gotten a break in life tools to make their own breaks?

I have known, over the course of my career, many parenting teens. They all have different stories, backgrounds, and circumstances that led to their current station in life. The commonality between them is that they need help. Some may grow up and abuse the system--I don't think we'll ever escape that. But most of them desperately want to escape poverty and need help to figure out how to do that. We're too busy lambasting "sluts" for getting pregnant so they could get on the dole that we can't see that breaking the cycle of poverty is possible.

Here's an example: one of my kids explained to me, in great detail, how to manipulate an interview with a social worker in order to become eligible for disability checks more quickly. She knew this because she learned from her mother. That same student had no idea what a FAFSA was or how to fill it out. Do we punish the mother's manipulation of the system by refusing to help her daughter figure out how to help herself? Because if we do that, we'll be paying for her daughter's disability checks soon enough.

Sidenote: If Juno was black, would the movie have been nominated for an Oscar? Would it even have been a comedy? Discuss.

Honestly, if we could just give Depo shots in the lunchline, we could alleviate this whole problem.

Who Do You Hate?

I may have mentioned before that Sleater Kinney's Carrie Brownstein has a music blog on NPR.org called Monitor Mix that is really a great read to add to you RSS reader. One of her latest posts, "A Plea for Banishment" talks about how a certain group of people really hate the Doors. This leads to roughly 100 comments about popular bands that people really hate, including ones I too hate, such as Nickelback, Kid Rock, Jimmy Buffet, U2 (don't hate, actually like The Joshua Tree, but just never really understood the popularity and never resonated with me), & Steeley Dan. There were other ones that I do love, including some I know I should not love, including Dave Matthews Band, Phish, and any other jam band, the entire genre of alt-country (?), Journey, REO Speedwagon, etc. Have these people no sense of irony?

My favorite quote from the comments was this:

The only thing in music that I've ever wanted to kill (rather than just not listen to) is Fine Young Cannibal's "She Drives Me Crazy" and that's so specific it's hardly worth mentioning in this context.

Agreed, but I do like "Good Thing."

What other artists do I just really loathe that other people celebrate? Let's set three ground rules: don't bother mentioning pop artists like Britney, or one-hit wonders, or pop country. They're all givens.

Me personally, besides Nickelback, I really can't stand anything emo or teeny-bopper punk pop that my cousins would listen to such as Hellogoodbye, Yellowcard (I guess anything else with a "ello" in it), Fallout Boy, Good Charlotte, ICP, Limp Bizkit, Marilyn Manson, Korn, and I really don't like the Beach Boys.

Your thoughts?

Snaked.

Damn. Of course someone with more time beat me to it.

Bitch is the New Black

Anyone see the return of SNL? Although I don't support Clinton, I don't irrationally hate her with the fire of a thousand suns like some folks. I liked guest host Tina Fey's endorsement of Clinton on Weekend Update...

Tina Fey: I want to say something about those calling Hillary a bitch...yeah, well she is...So am I, so is she (pointing at Weekend Update news host Amy Poehler.) Deal with it.

Bitches get shit done.

She goes on to proclaim, "Bitch is the new black."

I also enjoyed Huckabee's stint on Weekend Update. He seemed very willing to poke fun of himself. Damnit if he's not a likable guy. So's the devil, though.

Also, if you don't read Jessica Valenti and crew's Feministing, you should, because they keep it real over there. The comments section gives me hope that not everyone is still down with bullshit gender concepts designed to keep the woman down. Rise up with fists, y'all. You can see Tina Fey's SNL speech there.

Monday Thoughts of Little Consequence

Well, I'm probably going to go into blog hibernation for a few. Today is the first legal day of practice for spring sports in Missouri, so girls soccer is in full swing as of 3:15 today. This means that I will be busy after school every day from now until the middle of May, making girls run until they puke. For those of you who don't know me other than through my blog, I used to coach boys and girls soccer at our (tiny) high school, but I gave up boys this year because I started my doctoral work. Not that I don't love the boys, but the girls is another deal, and I wanted to see how my schedule worked out in the fall before I committed to girls. I decided that I wanted to coach spring and that we needed the money. Unfortunately, I'm really busy with school right now, too, so my schedule is basically work, soccer, school from here until May. Bummer. You'll know I'm procrastinating if I post.

Also discovered that my iPod was stolen, again, from work, sometime last week, but I'm not sure when. My fault, since I shouldn't have had it at school after the first theft, but I really was using it for some podcasts for Creative Writing. There are some straight thieves up in this bitch. Luckily, I have almost all of my newer music on my laptop, but I'll be starting over again whenever I get a new iPod, which is so soul-suckingly depressing that I can't even think about it. Good thing I'm getting a tax refund right quick. Why buy the new oven you need when you can buy a new iPod to replace the one stolen from you by the kids you are trying to help? Accepting cash donations. I'm about the pass the hat right in the hallway.

But, I can't complain, seeing as I worked 2 1/2 days last week and I'm going to Drive By Truckers on Friday night.

Snow Half Day

Oh yeah. Early release day! Can this weather continue until approximately 7AM tomorrow?

Awesome Student Quote

"Karate's weak."

--Student's contribution to discussion on muay-thai boxing.

Newslinks

Thanks to Feministing for the heads up on this article about how us cracker Westerners aren't birthin' 'nuff babies to preserve our righteous heritage. Damnit, we need more people on this planet. Can't y'all be more like the Duggars?

The Nation has a brief article on debunking the myth of the "cult of Obama", the media-induced notion that all of us Obama supporters have drank the Kool-Aid.

The Sunday Times "A Night Out With" featured Brian K. Vaughan, writer of Y: The Last Man (probably my all-time favorite comics not drawn by Dan Zettwoch) who is also a co-producer of Lost, as he toasts the last issue of Y: The Last Man. Better get down to Star Clipper this weekend and finish the series.

Have y'all seen the press for this: Rothbury, a "music festival revolution" taking place over the 4th in Michigan. I'd be totally down for this sustainability-focused event with a great lineup of artists and events, but the 4th is my mom's 50th birthday, my parents' 30th wedding anniversary, and possibly my ten-year reunion. Plus the sweet Americana/early morning sanctioned drinking of the Urbandale 4th of July parade.

Sweet Asshole Encounter

So after Chris and I went to see Persepolis, we stopped off at Racanelli's to pick up a pizza. As we waited for the pizza, we drank a beer, talked about the movie, and people watched. There was a family of four with two kids, probably 3 and 7 or so, whose pizza was delivered while we were waiting. After a few minutes, the mom waved the young employee over who delivered the pizza and said, really snottily.

"My kids really love cheese, and there's a big bubble here on this piece with no cheese. Can you put more cheese on it and put it back in the oven?"

It wasn't like the kids were sharing a little pizza and this perfectly-normal pizza-dough bubble was bogarting half of the surface area of said pizza. They had a fat large pizza. If you can't ease your kids into the indignities of life by giving them the fucking bubble piece of pizza and telling them to get over and be thankful that they have pizza to eat at all as opposed to a fly living on their mouth, then I sincerely hope I never have to teach your kids.

Disgusting Discoveries Via StatCounter

StatCounter, as many bloggers know, is super fun spy time. You can see who and what is reading your blog--not exactly who, but you can get a general idea. You can also see what paths people take to get to your blog--what Google searches yield your blog, what blogrolls are sending people your way, etc.

So gag me with a spoon when I found that someone found this post from my blog when doing a google search for "tight child c*** pics". Dirty perv in Rugby, England. Shouldn't there be a way to report stuff like this? Shouldn't your computer automatically freeze up if you do a search like this?

Weekend

It's hard coming back to reality after a four-day weekend. I took Friday (which was a development day) off to go to Minneapolis. Because of the previously-mentioned ridiculosity (TM me) of American Airlines, over two days, I was in four different airports flying three different carriers. Good times. Between Delta, American, and Northwest, Delta treated me least like cattle. They still give out peanuts and their seats are comfier. The Atlanta airport is horrible. I will never fly through there if I can help it. I also spent an inordinate amount of time perusing SkyMall, which, if you have never looked at it, contains possibly the largest collection of completely useless stuff in the developed world. I am actually going to do a post on it so you can see what rich folk spend their money on. In any event, I breathed enough stale air (and fart-laden air on one flight) to last me for at least another month, hopefully two.

School was really good--looking at analyzing problems using economic and political lenses and talking about political constructions. My cohort class really meshes well with my other class, Policy Development, so it's pretty cool to further understand how public policy works and how that may influence or even create problems. I may get to go to Washington this summer for a week-long policy class that meets on Capitol Hill, depending on how work schedules play out.

I got home around 10 on Saturday and hung out with Chris for the rest of the weekend, just relaxing around our house. We went and saw Persepolis, which I thought was awesome. I would highly recommend you go see it or at least read the graphic novels. It's funny and sad and gives a unique voice to the social history of contemporary Iranians. We also saw 3:10 To Yuma, which was good if you like westerns, so-so if you're just meh about them like us.

Last night on a whim, Chris and I committed to watching network television despite the fact that we don't actively watch any of the shows that are on Mondays. I seriously think I am dumber for that. The choices (I'm just guesstimating the titles): American Gladiators, My Dad Is Better Than Your Dad, Paradise Hotel 2 (?), Two and a Half Men, Carrie vs. Bruno: Dance Wars, Knight Rider the remake, Gossip Girl, the new season of that Pussycat Dolls show, & Prison Break. That is some unremarkable shit right there. Seriously, those shows make The Biggest Loser look like Masterpiece Theatre.

SOLVED Mystery

A colleague and I were just reminiscing on Saved By the Bell (he took the quiz while home sick yesterday) and how if you were an adolescent in the late 80s/early 90s, you could watch four episodes back to back on TBS and TNT (?) after school (then California Dreams, if you were so inclined), although there was the weird five minute delay for TBS shows. Remember that? When TBS started shows at five past the hour or 35 past the hour? Why did they do that? Can anyone solve this Unsolved Mystery now that Robert Stack has passed on (R.I.P)?

update: MYSTERY SOLVED!
Lazer e-mailed me this:

On June 29, 1981, TBS began to use "Turner Time"[5]. While other television offerings generally began at the top and bottom of each hour, TBS decided to begin airing programs five minutes later, at :05 and :35.
By using "Turner Time," TBS programs were listed under their own time entry in TV Guide, thus providing more exposure to the channel's programming. It also encouraged channel surfers who couldn't find anything interesting to watch at the top of the hour, to still be able to watch a TBS program without missing the first few minutes. Most importantly, since shows ended five minutes later than normal, it usually encouraged viewers to continue watching TBS rather than flip to watch another program already in progress.
TBS started to cut back Turner Time in 1997 from and scrapped it completely by 2000. TBS now schedules programs at the top and bottom of the hour (excluding Seinfeld on Tuesday evenings which airs at 9:15 and 9:45 p.m.; this is due to Sex and the City's length and the fact that commercials didn't air on its original network HBO).

Thanks, Lazer!

Awesome Student Quote

"I bought (former student who is pregnant) some Baby Einstein videos. That kid needs all the help it can get."

Sad, but true.

If I Can Hand It In Tomorrow It Will Be All Right.

Here's a link to a pretty awesome Saved By the Bell quiz. This ain't for amateurs. You needed something to occupy this morning when you should be home in bed, didn't you?

Then, vote for your favorite SBTB character. The winning character gets Valentine's Dinner at the Max.

A Cossssby Sweater

Swear I'm working on the Punxytawney post. I've been crazy busy: paper due today, buttloads (yes, BUTTLOADS) of reading to do, grading, and other miscellaneous prep for Minneapolis this weekend. Can I vent about that? What up with American Airlines, with whom I have flown faithfully all through this long-distance venture, tripling their prices from St Louis to Minneapolis this weekend? I can't fly direct for less than a grand. I ain't got that kind of scrilla, for real. So I'm going to traipsing around the country trying to connect to Minneapolis and still paying out the ass, knowing damn well that my normal return flight only has five people in it. GRRRR.

Spent a nice weekend mostly with Chris. Went out to eat with our friends Christine and Joe at Off the Vine on Hampton on Saturday, a very spur-of-the-moment, very expensive venture. The food was spectacular, the service, not so much. Try it for lunch before you commit to dinner. Also spent too much money at Euclid Records, where we purchased the new Jack Johnson and Gary Louris on vinyl and the new Drive By Truckers on CD. I could spend an entire paycheck in that joint as it totally reminds me of the record shop in High Fidelity.

Also, saw The Namesake and Art School Confidential this weekend. Yes, it was the weekend of 2006 movies. So what if we're behind? We loved the former and were just kind of meh about the latter. The plot was pretty obvious without being developed in any way. Also saw Paris Je T'aime, which was great and I would highly recommend. I might even use it in my classroom to show how microfiction works.

Sorry, I'm boring today, because I've got a lot to do. Which I am procrastinating doing by writing this.

Just One More Hit...

I swear this is the last Heidi Montag post I write about at least until Hills Season 4 premieres. Why would Heidi do an interview with Television Without Pity? Let us not question. Let us give thanks.

Awesome Student Quote

"All I'm saying is that if I had grown up in an house that wasn't just about alcohol, cigarettes, and Law & Order, I would have done better on the ACT."

Small Town Thoughts

Yesterday, I had an eye appointment at Hampton Village at 2. My Thursday schedule worked out that I just took the afternoon off. Chris had conferences, so I had planned on taking two buses to get to the eye doctor. For those of you that don't know, I sold my car in August because we really didn't need it and I hated the hassle of having it. I don't mind taking the bus. The only pain in the ass is they really don't run on schedule, so you can wait up to a half hour.

Anyway, I left school after Advisory and was waiting for the bus, when out of nowhere, two friends of mine whip around the corner of Big Bend and Manchester and pick me up. We went and ate chili at one's house and then the other took me to my appointment. After my brief appointment, I thought about taking two buses home, but decided to walk the mile and a half/two miles, because it was perfectly nice walking weather and I had This American Life podcasts to listen to. I walk about half a mile down Hampton before Chris's cousin whips into a parking lot and picks me up.

I thought about this when I got home, and what struck me, other than my incredibly good fortune to have my transportation needs taken care of, was that how much of a small town St Louis really is. Everyone knows everybody, and if you don't know someone, chances are you know someone who knows said person. And while it can get lame answering the "Where'd you go to high school" question with, "I'm from Iowa," I like that you can connect with people through an extensive network of friends.

Ironically, that same thought came to me as I watched the reports on the shooting in Kirkwood. The same friend who gave me a ride to the eye doctor is from Kirkwood, and I knew from her family's involvement with local politics, that there was almost no way she wouldn't know the shooter and the victims. An e-mail from her this morning confirmed what I had suspected: she knew all of the victims and the shooter. Her parents have lost their friends and are devastated. I can't imagine how citizens of Kirkwood feel right now. Keep them in your thoughts and prayers.

Somebody Stop This Train

I'm a blogging fiend today. I couldn't let the day go by without linking to this unintentionally hilarious interview with Heidi from the Hills, full of such gems as this:

How would you describe the sound of the record so far?
You can’t really describe it. It’s like its own genre of music. A little bit of it is hip-hop, some of it’s very…the best way to say it is that all of the songs make you want to dance. It’s all so amazing, and each song is totally different. Every one is like a genre of its own.

God bless you, Trent, for bringing this to my attention today.

My advice: watch the video I linked to earlier, read the article. Laugh hysterically. Make parody video. Post on YouTube. Become famous.

Super Tuesday

I'm working on a Groundhog post and a rant about some other stuff, so I don't have time to say much about Super Tuesday as of now. I did cast a proud vote for Obama this morning, and you can read Jaelithe's blog, as she pretty succinctly articulates why she and I both support him. VOTE OR DIE, BITCHES!

Monday Mornings and the Groundhog

Well, I have returned from Punxsutawney, and boy do I have stories to tell. That would involve me uploading pictures and processing the surrealness that was Groundhog Day. While I work on that, and, you know, stuff for my real job, go ahead and check out the shiteousness that is Heidi Montag's (from The Hills, like, duh) "music" video. This cannot be for real, can it? It was on Yahoo! Entertainment.

Stuff

My friend Sandra e-mailed me this link. You should totally watch it.

Student Quote

From a student's "persuasive" paper on why people should have cell phones:

"My brother talks to all of his lady friends that he met on MySpace with his cell phone."

Teacher Quote

From my lovely coworker Nancy, who keeps me going most days:

"Whatever happened to the serendipitousness of a snow day?"

--when discussing district procedures for determining whether in fact we will close school due to inclement weather.

What I'm Reading/Watching/Listening To

Music
I've been listening to a ton of Belle & Sebastian lately, mostly their B-sides compilation, Push Barman to Open Old Wounds. They also have a great free NPR:Live Concerts podcast of a show they did in DC (if you haven't check out NPR: Live Concerts, you totally, totally should). Chris also found an eerily Jeff Buckley-esque singer/songwriter named Matthew Santos. Same dude who did the hook on Lupe Fiasco's Superstar, and he's well worth checking out if you are a Buckley fan. Although not in the past few days, I've been listening to Okkervil River's The Stage Names, one of '07's best. If you are in STL, they're playing an as-of-yet unpublicized show at the Bluebird in March, which should be a good time despite my experience there with State Radio. Seeing a band you really love in a small venue is one of life's greatest pleasures.

Books
I haven't really had time to read books for fun until the past few days since I was crazily cramming in all my school readings, but after class, I was able to pick up the latest issue of The Believer. It's done by the folks at McSweeney's, and is worth the cost just to read Nick Hornby's monthly column "What I'm Reading". I also finished The Golden Compass and am now and atheist. The latest Ready Made came yesterday all about organizing your life. Nice effort, but I'm sure I'm still going to be the slob I've been for 27 years. Sometimes I wish I could just do projects from that magazine and have that be my life. Unfortunately, I gots to pay the bills, I don't live near an IKEA, and my aesthetic isn't really modern, or at least it doesn't come naturally.

Screens
Saw two great documentaries that you should definitely check out. Taken For A Ride is awesome on two levels: information and awesome late-80s styles. This film outlines the calculated demise of streetcars, spearheaded by GM, who needed a way to increase sales of personal automobiles. Our entire car culture was basically a construct of GMs business strategy. Think about how that's changed our entire country, and you'll realize why this is important.
Also saw This Film Is Not Yet Rated, which is all about the MPAA ratings system and how arbitrary and biased it is. For example, female orgasm or homosexual sex is almost guaranteed an NC-17 rating, or at least put your right on the border of R & NC-17. They also showed how violence is perfectly acceptable, but sex is taboo, which is basically the opposite of the European way of thought. The filmmaker hires private investigators to find out who exactly is on the MPAA ratings board (since it's not really public information). Of course, the movie itself got an NC-17 rating, so the filmmaker released it as NR. Really gives you insight into the film industry. Warning: total nudity. Lots of boobies, partially for irony, partially to demonstrate how what's totally R in one movie can be NC-17 in another.

We've also started watching Battlestar Galactica Season Two and Oz Season One. If you're into anal rape, shivs, cylons, or Edward James Olmos, check those out.

Off to Punxsutawney this weekend. Bing!

Live Notes from the State of the Union

51 weeks. 51 weeks. We can do it, guys.

Sigh. Is he really our president? Really? Two terms? Sweet Jesus, we get what we deserve, I swear.

*Cheney is a smug son of a bitch. This would be ten times more entertaining if Pelosi had a "I'm with stupid" shirt on or busted out laughing every once and a while. Bunny ears? It's your only chance, Nance. Come on; throw us a bone!

*How much more awesome would the State of the Union be if reactions other than a) clapping with a smirk or b) not clapping with a bored look, were allowed. Even just a "can you believe this asshole" point with a withering look or a knowing shake of the head. Right now, the most subversive behavior allowed is to read the program like you aren't listening.

*Cut to Obama pensively thinking with a fist to his mouth, thinking, "How can I liven this shit up a bit?" I'll tell you what: when Obama is president, all he needs to do is stand up there, hold his hands up and look around with a grin on his face as if to say, "What now, motherfuckers?" and it would be infinitely more awesome than this awful display of constructed reality. Actually, he could stand up there and say, "Give it up for my man Rrrrrandy Watson-ah." and it would be infinitely more awesome that this.

*NCLB is a bipartisan achievement? Achievement is not the word most people who are professional educators would use.

*Do you have anyone who doesn't work for a non-renewable energy company in your cabinet or in the EPA? Carbon sequestering is NOT the answer. The majority of coal is NOT clean. Keep talking like you made huge strides with emissions reductions. We're the only developed country to NOT ratify Kyoto and we were BOOED in Bali. The idea that we're "leading the way" when it comes to reducing greenhouse gas emissions is laughable at best, a bald-faced lie if we're being honest.

*I ask congress to ban the buying, selling, patenting or cloning of human life. But we can patent non-human lives with no qualms. There goes my eBay kidney business.

*Cheney only stands up when Bush mentions warmongering or the military.

*Has he read 1984? Do you think he understands the term Orwellian? I highly, highly doubt it. War=peace, right?

*Okay,okay I would stand up for the armed forces. I would, and I support veterans benefits and extended benefits to military families. And I do not support genocide. Why isn't everyone standing up for that statement. Aren't we all against genocide?

*I'd love to see the margin notes scribbled between Democrat congresspeople and senators. Do you think they're about the ridiculousness of the speech, or more along the lines of my marginal notes from class this weekend that said, "All I can think about is a burrito."

*Aaaaannnnndd, cut to The Office. Where at least the wildly foolish man in charge is fictional.

God bless America.

P.S. CBS post-speech coverage:
Katie Couric: Can you predict what people will say about him after his presidency?
Some dude: It doesn't look good.

Would You Like Some Pancakes?

If you answered yes, you should read my friend Alice's article in the Suburban Journal. She's a serious nutrition student who once went to Rooster and had the balls to order oatmeal with pureed pumpkin and cinnamon.

I'm heading up to the arctic tundra of Minnesota for my first class of the semester. Should be a good time if I read 100 pages tonight. Likely. Or I could just watch the Battlestar Galactica Season Two DVD I got from Netflix today. Like I tell my kids every Friday, make good choices.

Don't forget to e-mail me at kbestoliver at yahoo dot com if you want a zine. They are super duper.

HumpDay Playlist

These days, work is sucking my soul dry and I'm yearning for weather warm enough to sit on my front porch with a beer and a book (one I'm reading for pleasure, please). Music is getting me by. What's poppin' today as I write curriculum and lesson plans, corral kids, and try to read for school? How about a little playlist to feel empowered and happy?

Another Sunny Day--Belle and Sebastian
Breakin' Up--Rilo Kiley
Young Folks--Peter Bjorn and John
All the Young Dudes--Mott the Hoople
Brass In Pocket--The Pretenders
Shiver--Coldplay
Cut Your Hair--Pavement
Race for the Prize--The Flaming Lips
My Name Is Jonas--Weezer
Trying Gets You Nowhere--Goodnight Ghost
A Better Son/Daughter--Rilo Kiley
Take Me To The Riot--Stars
Good To Know--Stephen Brodsky
We Do Not Fuck Around--Viva Voce
What's Mine Is Yours--Sleater Kinney

Zine-tastic. Get your very own.

Big, big ups to Dr. King. I can't say anything that hasn't already been said, but I echo sentiments that recognize how far our society has come, yet acknowledge how far we have yet to go.

Chris and I spent the weekend chilling and having an all out relaxing time, something much needed. That extra day is crucial to relaxation, particularly since my trips to Minneapolis start up again this coming weekend, and I heard its like -72 there or something. And I have to read this whole book on Adam Smith between now and Friday, plus supplementary readings on Marx.

We also spent a large portion of our weekend working on a new project that we came up with because we were feeling like we wanted to make something and we were both struggling with some writer's block.

We set a goal to create and produce a zine in 24 hours. Everything had to be written and laid out in that span of time, and we copied and stapled today. Anyhow, we produced 25 copies, and we're offering them free to the first 25 people who either comment on this post or Chris's blog or e-mail me. I will mail one to you, free of charge, or give one to you next time I see you, your choice. We are not visual artists, but I like how it turned out. It's a mix of sociopolitical rants and fun stuff. Delurk and request a copy fo' free, y'all.

Buellerizing My Life

Sweet Jesus, the thought of a three day weekend is exhilarating. Thank you, Dr. King. Couple that with me going to Minnesota next Friday, translating into a three-day work week next week, THEN going to Punxytawny the following weekend, and, well, I'm just not really going to work very much, now, am I? Guess it's time to start Twittering.

Morning Person

I ask you, is there a worse feeling than waking up in the darkness and realizing your alarm is going off in two minutes? I think not. Which is why when I woke up, squinting at Chris's alarm clock this morning, I was fully prepared to be disappointed and exhausted, again. I ain't been sleeping very well lately. But I squinted harder, looking like my mom used to look when we'd wake her up at 2:15AM to open presents from Santa, and realized yes...dare I hope...YES! there was a 4, not a 6, on the hour side. I still had two hours to sleep. Then, Chris got up and took care of the pets this morning instead of doing our usual, "It's your turn" tango and let me sleep a little bit extra.

I've been going through some drama lately, which I will post about at a later date when it is more appropriate. Don't worry, I'm not trying to pop out a shorty or anything, although I thought I was going to for a minute. THAT really threw things into a tizzy 'round here. But I'm good now. That's a Bob Schneider song.

I've also been very busy trying to get all my reading done for school. We have seven books for my cohort class to read before January 25, and then we have to read them all over again over the course of the semester. There are four non-fiction and three fiction texts. I've got two fiction done, one non-fiction done, and two other started. The course is about critical issues and the social, political, and economic contexts, and, from the fictional texts, we're really going to be looking at the effects of colonialism on African nations. If you haven't, you should really read Barbara Kingsolver's The Poisonwood Bible
as it is easily one of the best books I have ever read AND a book that everyone should read.

The other class I'm in, History of Critical Ed (yeah! my first official critical pedagogy course) has three books and a ton of supplementary stuff, and I'm anxious to get into it once I finish my cohort class work. Awesomely, the first non-fiction text I read was all about ritual, myth, and symbolism in world cultures, and it was all difficult to read, but the last chapter is all about WWF as myth and symbolism. So it was pretty sweet to open up this academic book and see a picture of Sergeant Slaughter and Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake coupled with an in-depth analysis of the overarching patriotic symbolism of a typical WWF episode in the 80s. Totally bitch.

Polticky-ness

Hmmm. Elections. Somethings in the air, and I like it, I think.

Let me say, I like what seems like a real involved effort for participation on the part of America. But more on that later. First, let me address what I don't like. I really don't like how the media is shaping our news in general, specifically the elections. I preface this rant by admitting that I'm reading a book on that very topic for school right now, called Constructing the Political Spectacle by Murray Edelman. It's totally hilarious how last week, OMG Obama with the upset! Nobody saw it coming! (even though a lot of real people actually did) Lily-white Iowa voted for a brown person! Then, last night, OMG Clinton with the upset! Nobody saw it coming! People with penises voted for a woman! That is so 1984-ish I can't even believe it. Does the media think that people have so little brain capacity that they can't remember one week ago? Edelman talks about how there's no way media can be fair and balanced (ha!) because there is subjectivity in the selection of what "facts" (and he uses the term loosely) are included, highlighted, even obsessed about via a 24-hour feed with scrolling tickers. What's totally fascinating is that he wrote this book in the 80s, before them thar internets exponentially increased the exposure to information that the average American has on the daily. They want to increase the real!life!drama because people will watch if it is entertaining. If it isn't, and there isn't some kind of narrative storyline, then they won't. And they are in the business of selling that narrative storyline, so it is in their best interest. People in general really aren't interested in the news unless they perceive that it has a direct correlation to their lives. Why do you think local news stations are milking the Hwy 40 shit for all it is worth? They know people will watch because that directly affects their lives. I'd say more and draw more parallels, but as I am a master procrastinator (see prior post), I am only on Chapter Three.


Damn, y'all. This thing ain't even close to being over. Do you realize how close it really? How close Iowa really was? After two tiny states with a largely rural population of white people. I mean, you know I rep the DMI, but they are hardly indicative of the wishes of the American public in general. The percentage difference in votes was relatively large, but the number of delegates between Edwards, Clinton,and Obama was two, total. There are still 48 states to go, with many, many more delegates to pledge.

What's awesome about it? Um, did you ever think four years ago (or even two years ago) that the biggest fight for president, the two legitimate contenders for the democratic nomination, would be a woman and a Black man? Seriously? Yeah, it's no big. Or, damn, a MORMON. Like, thank Big Love for that (I KID! I know LDS and FLDS are completely totally different things. Don't e-mail me.) Seriously, I think it is actually really fascinating that when they would first interview people about the "freakshow" that is Clinton/Obama/Romney and people say, "Well, I don't know if a woman/Black man/Mormon is ready to be president," or "You know, I don't know if the country is ready for a woman/Black man/Mormon as president." For reals? Only old WASPs have the moxie or merit to be president? We haven't evolved past the patriarchy? Stone fucking Ages, man. Of COURSE we're ready for it. We're desperate for it, craving it, wishing someone or something different would happen. And here it is. I'll give Bush credit for one thing, and that's making it abundantly clear to the public in general that being pasty and having twig and berries and some family money is clearly not enough to lead this country. That's why people are responding so well to Obama's speeches. Sheesh, don't we deserve an intelligent president that can stir a nation with his or her words, inspire hope that we don't have to live in a country completely dominated by assholes, and sure as shit doesn't say shit like this:

"I got a lot of Ph.D.-types and smart people around me who come into the Oval Office and say, 'Mr. President, here's what's on my mind.' And I listen carefully to their advice. But having gathered the device, I decide, you know, I say, 'This is what we're going to do.'" --George W. Bush, Lancaster, Pa., Oct. 3, 2007.

Okay, I've got to calm down. I've got myself all in a flush. And, even though he is a white male, I love me some John Edwards, too. Can we have an Obama/Edwards ticket?

Procrastination

All I ever do is put off doing other things. Like right now, I'm putting off planning one of my classes tomorrow, finishing this curriculum that I've been putting off since, oh, June, and reading Constructing the Political Spectacle by Murray Edelman. Why would I do those things when I can upload pictures to my laptop and post them here? Like of my new tattoo. Right forearm, by Luke at AllStar Tattoo in U City.

Brief Note

If you want to feel good, listen to Golden Smog's cover of The Kinks "Strangers" on their disc Another Fine Day featuring the sweet, sweet vocal harmonies of Jeff Tweedy and Gary Louris. You heard The Kinks version on The Darjeeling Limited soundtrack. So good, I got up and went across the room to replay the song on vinyl. Oh, wait, you can listen to it (and the rest of this kickass album) streaming online here.

P.S. If you don't know Gary Louris from the awesome band The Jayhawks, you should, at least, if you like alt-country. If you don't know who Jeff Tweedy is, then you are dead to me.

Happy Monday/Thursday

It's a Monday/Thursday--a Thursday, but the first day back with the kids at school so it feels like a Monday. I don't feel like Monday, actually, I feel like a pile of poo that desperately needs a full night of sleep without dreaming of replicant clone robots, but whatever.

If you are like me and shudder when you recall having to sit through the painful, painful trailer for the new Alvin and the Chipmunks movie, gasping when you saw your beloved Jason Lee as Dave, poured one out for the Brodie-Man's career, then said, "Oh fuck no" and thought art is dead when you saw that David Cross was also in it, you should read Cross's justification of why he did this god-awful piece of shit movie. It's entertaining.

Also, just FYI, in my first hour class of the day, Creative Writing, I shit you not, I had a kid say, to the entire class, that he was highly intelligent, had a narcissistic complex, and was a "very skilled writer". Seriously. He said all these things about himself as the entire class simultaneously rolled their eyes. This is the same kid who came in the Writing Center last year and said that Coldplay was "good music to chief to." Who says "chief" as a thinly-veiled euphemism for smoking pot in 2007? In front of a teacher? Who does he think he is, Slater from Dazed and Confused?

Addendum

At Chris's request, I took down a picture of him and Asher because "you are projecting an image of, fucking, I mean, it's not a real thing, man. The picture creates more than you create, man."